Couple Building a Home

A NEST or A CAGE- Which are you Building?


About ‘My Mother’s Diary’- In my Mum’s dairy are many stories and thoughts. Stories and lessons learned from her over five decades on earth, over thirty years of marriage and with a youthful heart. I believe these stories would be of immense blessing to you as it was and still is to me. Join me as I unfold these stories of love, marriage, and hope for a greater future…


I stood at the balcony of the guest house to enjoy the cool weather. My room faced the well cultivated garden with its beautiful flowers and trees. The weather was so soothing, energizing me for the task ahead, while the flowers released a pleasant fragrance luring me to go down to the garden for a touch.

garden flowers

I had travelled to South Africa on a busy schedule. I knew the days ahead were going to be very hectic, so pampering myself to an hour or two to enjoy the beauty of nature would not be a crime. As I stood at the balcony enjoying the beautiful works of God, my attention was suddenly drawn to two birds by a tree. I noticed these birds had made several trips between two trees, so I became curious.

As I watched them fly from one tree to another, I noticed they were picking straws from one tree to build a nest in the other. As I paid keen attaention, I couldn’t help being impressed by the diligence and hardwork they displayed. They focused on the task at hand, selecting their straws so carefully. Despite their determination to finish it on time,  they remained very vigilant against any intruder.

I thought to myself, if birds can put in so much into a temporary shelter, to give their eggs and young ones comfort and keep them safe; how much do we humans put in to build our marriages for our children’s safety and comfort?

Marriage is like human nest; built by couples in marriage to protect, comfort and nurture their young ones into becoming a matured, responsible and purposeful individual. The strength of a couple’s relationship in marriage are like straws used in building their home for the next generation. How the next generation turns out will depend on the materials used in building.

When materials such as love, forgiveness and understanding are used, it strengthens the nest, giving it comfort, protection and as well builds the confidence of the coming generation. Homes built with these materials stand strong in the face of the storm.

On the other hand, homes built in the midst of anger, hatred, bitterness, contentions, self centeredness and such like, no matter how beautiful it looks, it cages the potential of the coming generation. The instability in such homes affect them emotionally, mentally and sometimes physically; resulting in insecurity. They doubt the authenticity of human relationships because of the failure of the one that produced them. Their self-esteem is often affected and in some cases they live in rebellion. I have actually seen such cases. Such homes crumble in the face of the storm because it was built on shaky grounds. 

Building a nest for the new generation may not be an easy task but building a cage is not an option. The grace of God, who is the master builder, is available to as many as are willing and obedient. (Isaiah 1:19)

Unless the Lord builds a house, the work of the builders is wasted. Unless the Lord protects a city, guarding it with sentries will do no good.’ Psalms 127:1 NLT

What are you building for the new generation, A NEST or a CAGE?  Our lives, society, country and the world at large is influenced by your choice.

Enjoy This Season of Love

6 thoughts on “A NEST or A CAGE- Which are you Building?”

  1. Wow this is so apt and direct
    It is timely cos the steps we take today in regards to building up a solid relationship and home determines what future we build for our children.

  2. Nice write up.. Not forgetting the fact that the Birds were on the lookout for any intruder while building the nest.. Therefore in marriage, you need to be on the look out for any intruder while building the nest for the young generations else the nest won’t be completed..

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